SURGA AZIZ

CHICAGO - The members of Korn are about to get a big apology from one of their own -- and you can read it along with them.

Bassist Fieldy has released a book, "Got the Life: My Journey of Addiction, Faith, Recovery and Korn," this week. The book includes letters Fieldy (born Reginald Arvizu) wrote to each band member apologizing for his past bad behavior.

Fieldy said he gave an advance copy to guitarist James "Munky" Shaffer but he has yet to hear his reaction. He said he expects frontman Jonathan Davis to read it as well. He didn't give them the letters privately because he wanted to be open about his sobriety.

Fieldy, 39, struggled with alcohol, drugs and overeating. He would even eat food off other people's used room-service trays -- even trash cans. He also was a womanizer and liked to intimidate anyone, male or female, who disagreed with what he calls "Fieldy's rules."

He quit cold turkey when his father, a born-again Christian, told him his dying wish was for his son to find God. Now he's married with three children and working on a new album with Korn and his side project, Stillwell.

AP: You were kind of a jerk when you were on drugs.

Fieldy: I was as bad as it gets. What I wrote in the book, I was probably worse than that. I couldn't really explain how bad it was. Me trying to kill people wasn't as bad as me tearing people down and making people cry and ripping them apart, because words never heal. That's what I've learned. I'd rather raise my son and tell him, "If you get in a fight with your friend, just punch him. Don't say anything, because the next day he doesn't get over that.'"

AP: How old were you when you became an alcoholic?